Monday, June 19, 2006

 

Mom's Restroom Humor

During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners asks the 3rd grade students, one by one.
"Michael, if you were on a date, having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the rest room," she asked.

"Just a minute, I have to go pee", he said.

The teacher replied, "That would be rude and impolite.
What about you John, how would you say it?"

"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back."

The teacher responded, "That's better, but it's still not very mannerly to say the word 'bathroom' at the table."

"And you Peter, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners."

I would say: "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."

The teacher fainted.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

 

Where to place the remains?



Boingboing has a great link to an Asian candy must-have. The commerorative candy is from the movie GRAVE OF THE FIREFLIES. The movie is about a set of orphans that starve to death on an island. The sister's cremated remains are held in this candy tin replica. I ordered the candy and moved the anime movie to #1 on my netflix queue.

Can anyone recommend other Asian candy delights?

 

Here's another from Mom

The new birds and the bees

A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers: "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!

Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to do a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button.

Nine months later a blessed little Pop-Up appeared and said: "You've Got Male "

 

Jokes from my Mommy

My mom just turned 60 last October. She enjoys forwarding jokes to her sonon occassion. I would like to share these on the blog.

Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?"
Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."
"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you Get?"
"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, Shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred Dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"
Well, for one, I like to watch my money grow. Two, once in a while I like to play with my money, and three, I like how money feels in my hand, and, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."

Larry is recovering in room 232 at John Hopkins Hospital if you want to visit him.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

 

This week's comic books


I have been reading comic books since 1991. I was first hooked on Sandman. My local supplier - New England Comics - sets aside my weekly stash for a monthly pick-up. I highly recommend the Cambridge store to all comic book fans!!!!

I am fairly indescriminate with my selections. It seems like I read alot of Marvel and DC looking at this week's list:

52 #6; CHECKMATE #3; CIVIL WAR #2; EXILES #82; EX MACHINA SPECIAL #2; FABLES #50; GREEN ARROW #63; JLA CLASSIFIED #22; LEGENDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT #207;
MS MARVEL #4; NIGHTWING #121; SENSATIONAL SPIDER-MAN #27; SQUADRON SUPREME #4; WOLVERINE ORIGINS #3; and ULTIMATE X-MEN #71 .

I want to try and add mini-reviews to this blog in the future. I am always appreciative of the few comic book review sites I can find.

My bookmark of the month for reviews is Dave's Rants Archive Homepage. The rants are brief and too the point.

 

Public Key Cryptography

I realize that this is a new blog with no readers, but I will ask anyway. Or throw my pennies into the wishing well...

The company is requesting data security on laptops in case of theft. The VA data theft has everyone at the utility company thinking about security this week.

My boss is pushing PKI. If anyone has any feedback on Public Key Cryptography in Windows Server 2003, please post a comment.

I am reading through the white papers on microsoft.com.

 
This is why I continue to show up at work. This is an actual trouble ticket from this morning:

A new contractor started with us yesterday and we were informed that her name was Sheretta Jackson however her last name is now McClain. She was assigned user name jackss but we'd like to get it changed as soon as we can.

What's the problem? I hope IT wasn't the reason she changed her name.

Monday, June 12, 2006

 

My name is Norm, first time blogger, long-time reader

My name is Norm Coates and I am a 30-something year old ex-social worker, IT project manager in training at the local utility company. I have a lovely wife (psychologist) and 20 month old daughter (spirited toddler). My hobbies are comic books and action figures. I believe that should give me some material to write about, don't you?

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